I thought I was done with goodbyes. Instead, last spring I found myself breaking up with my boyfriend of two-and-a-half years. I knew with all of my heart and soul that I needed to dive deep into myself for personal growth, and I couldn’t do that in a relationship. Still I hated saying goodbye again.

I’ve had a few times in my life where I’ve had to say goodbye. It has never seemed my choice. It was for the betterment of all. I could have stayed in the situation, but in each situation it would NOT have been the “best” decision.

I said good-bye to a child as I gave her up for adoption (as she needed 2 parents) I’ve said good-bye to a marriage. I’ve said good-bye to people I’ve had strong connections with but it just wasn’t the right timing.

Each and every time it has been heart wrenching. I felt as if my chest had been ripped open, my heart stabbed, and the wound left gaping open, maybe one piece of scotch tape to patch it all together.

However, each and every time, I’ve gotten through it. At first by copious amounts of alcohol – maybe you can relate? But as I matured, I learned to make better choices for my health. Journaling, breathing, yoga, and movement suit me better now.

And recently, I remembered something else important about goodbyes. I saw the child I gave up for adoption, (yes, she is still in my life) and the ex boyfriend all in the same day! It warmed my heart seeing both people. I realized that goodbye is never goodbye. It is more of a transition of relationship. Never ending as each person we are in or have been in relationship with always resides some where within us. Whether we like it or not.

The only constant is change. One guarantee in life we can count on. Easy? Not always. But necessary to evolve. I know that from each and every transition I have learned some thing. And it seems my greatest lessons have come from the hardest transitions in my life.

What about you? What have you survived? What have you learned from a goodbye?